It seems so innocent, a room full of bicycles. What could possibly be so horribly wrong with a spin class.
It appears as though the 1st thing wrong which still has me in unbelievable pain is the bicycle seat. I'm not sure what masochist designed this thing, but it appears to be made out of pure hate. It's small and unassuming but it's the most uncomfortable thing I have ever sat on in my life. So uncomfortable that it becomes painful after just a few short minutes. There is no way to adjust to the seat, there is no way to wrap your flabby ass around it and pad it differently to make it feel less awful (notice I didn't say better). It's just a few inches of demonized hell waiting to wreck your evening and (if you're knew at the game) your next day or so.
I did not finish the spin class, I don't even know how long it runs therefor I don't know how close I was to completing it. What I do know is that I could have gone low speed and at least finished the class if it were not for this seat causing me to be the most uncomfortable I have been since a 5 hour bus ride in high school where I was only able to have half my ass sitting on the seat at all times. Today I sit before this computer screen having to adjust to get myself to a comfortable sitting position because this bloody bike seat has bruised my precious buttocks. F'you bike seat, F'you.
Now for something completely different.
The more I am reading the more I am finding that this is like a small glimpse into my own inner workings at times.
Over on the Chaos Theory blog the author goes into how he likes to write as compared to how others like to write and I 100% am the same way. In fact, I've come very close to making a very similar post to the one that I have linked you too to describe my writing style. I think it's a good article and peeps should check it out.
My only current issue is that I have no issue pounding out blog posts such as this when I'm just sitting down for a few minutes and want to discuss my daily events with y'all, or make an observation about a commercial holiday dedicated to women being in love and bad romance rising voodoo or whatever. My current issue is a bad case of writers block, or idea block, or I know I want to put some sort of fiction into the printed word but I have deleted more starting paragraphs than I care to count because I cannot find a good way to begin my story.
Reading the Chaos Theory article really helped put that into perspective for me, because when I'm into something and writing about it I just go until the words run out. Later I can return to it and organize my thoughts better and tweak it here and there but when I'm typing I just keep going like the Energizer Bunny.
My issue is that I have no beginning and thus I cannot get into the flow of writing. I have never been good with just jumping in at a different point and taking off. It feels horribly unnatural to me and I never accomplish anything by doing it. I have to start at the beginning, it's a curse. And right now it's one that has me banging my head on the keyboard, hitting delete and then waiting for that killer introduction to just come to me so I can share my story with the world (or at least my own little part of the world that involves you kind people who bless me with your presence on a daily basis).
BLARGHHHH.
I am going to go read that article, but my suggestion is "just write." I spent more than a decade trying to come up with an original idea. A decade of not writing fiction.
ReplyDeleteStrangely, once the lightning bolt hit and I started writing, I got flooded with ideas. I won't live long enough to write them all.
Don't torture your muse, beat the shit out of it. Just start typing and the ideas will come.
Splitter
That is the plan my man.
DeleteThe main reason for this whole blogging thing.
Just sitting down and typing out random crap on daily basis or whatever rhythm I end up settling into.
Thanks for the encouragement.
So what you're saying is spin class was a total pain in the ass, huh?
ReplyDeleteNice link, I went over there and posted a comment. Getting into this writing/blogging thing has been an interesting experience for me.
I didn't hear no rim shots..... but yes, spin class was a pain in the arse.
DeleteI enjoy writing and am starting to really enjoy blogging. I enjoy getting feedback from people who are willing to take a few moments out of their day to actually read what I have to say and then respond to it. It's quite a unique experience as the last time I had that it was in school when people were forced to read my drivel and respond.
wassuppp
ReplyDeletei haz road bike with tiny seat and yep i used to have pain in teh neverregionz
my advice would be to try and tilt the seat like this:
if teh bike is facing ---> tilt the seat like this \
gl
Thanks for that advice. Next time I work up the nerve to give the class a shot I'll see if I can tilt the seat and if that makes a difference.
DeleteI'll also be bringing a seat cushion for my flabby ass.
Yeah, I definitely think I'm not going to be trying spin class anytime soon. In my quest to get in shape, I think I'll stick to the comfort of my home gym :S
DeleteGood luck with your writer's block, I know how crippling it can be. Blogging is definitely a good way to go to help this.
Brandon, I love the comic that your name links to.
DeleteCheck it every day for updates.
PS this is Fboy xd
ReplyDeleteforgot no discusss
this is uncomfortably close to a Tony post about anal polyps.
ReplyDelete